Outfit details
Alala blanket jacket (all sizes still available via Six:02)
Heroine Sport studio tank
Werkshop x Ghost and Stars catstronaut crops
Shoes: Nike Metcon 2 (customized)
Sunnies: Kate Spade “Dusty” (different color)
Photos: Kylie Pond Photography
I like to look cute as much as the next girl. I like to feel like my clothes are stylish and cool.
On the other hand, I also like to throw in something completely off the wall. Sometimes the things I love aren’t things you might consider “fashionable” in the typical sense.
So then I end up wearing a cat in space and a moody mesh jacket.
Although of course I love good design and impeccable style, part of me is also drawn to the offbeat, the quirky, and the eccentric. Over the years I’ve been experimenting with my personal style, I’ve been learning to accept and eventually fully embrace these oddities rather than eschew them.
For me, fashion and personal style is about expression. I don’t dress for others, I dress for me. I choose my outfits because I want what I wear to reflect my mood, my personality, or simply the things I like. What I wear reflects pieces of who I am.
But there’s no denying that there’s a certain pressure put on us by society, others, and even ourselves that “stylish” is supposed to look a certain way. For some of us, our style and what we truly love fits neatly into that box, but for others of us…maybe not so much. As a result, when I’m drawn to buy or wear certain things, sometimes there’s this naysayer in my head that tells me it’s too weird, I’ll feel embarrassed, other people will look at me funny and judge me, and so on and so forth.
When I feel a knee-jerk reaction that says “no, you shouldn’t wear that”, I’ve been making a conscious effort to pause and ask myself why I feel that way. More often than not, the answer is somehow rooted in fear. Fear that others will think I have bad taste, or that I’m weird, or that I’m unattractive… You get the idea.
But why should I be afraid, really? Why should I let fear of what others think put a damper on my self-expression?
I’ve been working on leaning into those fears, little by little. When I feel that little bit of discomfort, that little bit of “maybe I’ll feel silly if I wear this”, I take a deep breath and do it anyway. I try to remind myself that maybe I’ll love the result after all–and sometimes I do.
I realize this might sound a little bit dramatic. It’s just clothes, right? Well, yes, and no.
It’s great that it’s “just clothes”, because that means if you do mess up (if you can even call it that), it really doesn’t matter. What’s the worst that can happen? Maybe people think you’re a little strange? Odds are, they’ll forget about it in five seconds anyway. Or, maybe you end up not loving the outfit yourself. You put yourself out there and you take a tiny, tiny risk, but at the end of the day, life goes on and there are no real consequences if that risk doesn’t pan out. Either way, you’ll learn more about your personal style and what you love.
But more broadly, fashion is the perfect place to practice for the more important things in life. By pushing ourselves to push through discomfort, we’re getting practice on making other difficult and uncomfortable decisions. When we strive to worry a tiny bit less about what others think of us, we’re better equipped to feel more sure of ourselves. When we practice exuding confidence in what we wear, that confidence starts to spill over into all areas of our lives.
Maybe it’s really not just about the clothes after all.
Nice. You’re on a roll!
I literally think these exact things very often (especially when I wear werkshop to drop my son off during the morning daycare rush)!
Especially this: “When we strive to worry a tiny bit less about what others think of us, we’re better equipped to feel more sure of ourselves.”
I bet the other moms who see you when you drop your son off are all thinking “I need to find out where she got her leggings” or “She looks awesome in those leggings, I wish I could pull that off,” rather than being judgy :) When I see other girls wearing cool work-out wear I’m always thinking something along those lines.
thank you!
i like your attitude and i pledge to believe that you are right from now on :)
Thanks Carrie. :)
So happy to see this post. I’ve been wearing crazy prints and crazy slits and slashes all over my workout gear and skulls on shoes from Brazil for years. It’s different but I don’t like being typical.
Yup! Some of my stuff looks pretty run-of-the-mill, sure, but if that’s all I ever wore, I would get so bored!
You got that right! And I love the cat in space leggings!
Thanks!! I love ’em too. ;)
Thank you for writing about this. I totally feel nervous whenever I wear crazy leggings because I think people will be like “why on earth did she buy that.” But you’ve inspired me to finally buy the werkshop leggings I’ve been eyeing for so long!
Yesss, that’s awesome!! :) So glad I could help nudge you in that direction. I hope you love them. :)
I love crazy leggings. I own a bunch of K.deer leggings and some leggings are out there with the patterns it gets people’s attention lol
Yup! I went hiking in my catstronaut crops and I think almost everyone we saw on the trail said something about them.
Very much agree. I’ve been fighting against the “you shouldn’t do/say/wear that because judgement” since I was a kid. Which is not to say I don’t give into that fear of judgement frequently! But the older I get, the less I care what others think…
Different but related, several years ago I decided to start phasing out of wearing makeup (I’ve HATED makeup since I was first introduced to it) and now I only wear it for very special occasions. I was worried in the beginning that people would judge me for it, but ya know – not a single person has noticed (or at least, they haven’t mentioned it, which is good enough for me)! It was so damn liberating to give up something I never liked in the first place, and to do it in spite of societal expectations!
Oh – I love that you phased out makeup! I have often thought about doing that. I need to get over my insecurity about how I look without it. Good for you on taking that big step!
I know there’s sometimes baggage with makeup and it’s not as simple as saying “it’s great and you should try it”, but it’s great and you should try it :)
I’m still getting over my insecurities, but that’s just part of being human I think! Not hiding behind makeup has forced me to really deal with those insecurities, though.
i did this too about a year ago! one great thing i have found is that on the rare occasions when i do wear makeup for a special event or something, people say “WOW you look GREAT!”, which is so much better than the old days when i wore makeup everyday and then if i went one day without it, people said “WOW you look SO TIRED!” :)
I noticed that too! :)
You have inspired me, BD! :-)
Huh, that’s an interesting little social experiment. More power to ya! I bet it saves a lot of $$ too. I like makeup but I at least try not to wear it on weekends (unless I have some party/special occasion) so that I don’t get too attached. It’s always good to feel ok about your plain ol’ face. :)
Clothes for me must first be comfortable. After that it’s mostly what I like. I wear crazy legging to work out and out and about during the day.
At work, I am a little more boring (still comfortable). I have worn brightly colored leggings (onzie flower ones) under a black tunic. That was an outfit I received compliments on instead of my usual black pants and jewel tone top.
Yes, comfort is a huge priority for me too. Thankfully most of my activewear fits the bill–heh. Sometimes I’ll wear a tunic/dress with bold printed leggings, like you mentioned. It’s comfortable and pretty fun too. :)
Love the werkshop leggings! Question– I’m a size 4 in lulu, size 25 jeans..What size do you recommend in werkshop? Thanks! (I do like me some compression)
i’m the same and i wear a small in werkshop. fits perfectly.
Awesome thanks!
You may also be able to get away with an XS, too. I’m like a 24/25 in jeans (I think? I rarely wear jeans anymore lol) and the XS works. It would be very tight initially, and maybe a bit hard to get on, but they do mold to your body over time. You could probably go either way.
I love wearing crazy outfits. As long as my husband doesn’t think it’s too crazy, I will do it. I just got these sunglasses from Quay Australia that totally make my face look like a giant bug and I love it. I also have a thing for wearing crazy hats in the winter…. =) Be yourself and rock on I say!
Yup, you nailed it! I’ve been eyeing a few Quay Australia sunnies too. My face shape looks weird in most sunglasses, but maybe I should take a page out of your book and just not care. :)
Great post! I can relate to this!
Thank you, glad you enjoyed it. :)
It is as if you read my mind posting this. I wore my catstronauts capris the other day and my teenage kids laughed at me and I mean laughed AT me not WITH me. Yes they’re quirky and I am instantly attracted to things that go outside of the box of the all black leggings while I’m at barre. When I was younger I loved to push the limits and go against conformity but as a 40 year old I often ask myself ok how far can I go? Answer…as far as I am comfortable and confident wearing. Hey as long as no obscene lady bits are flashing I’m good and that should be a rule of thumb for women of all ages. My catstronauts make me happy and I keep checking back on the Werkshop website for a restock of the dragon pair because they remind me of Game of Thrones. I’m totally ok with dressing and being a little “mad hatter” when I workout. Hey whatever motivates me.
Yeah, I agree, there’s some basic social propriety to keep in mind (I’m not exactly gonna wear a bikini to work), but other than that, the sky’s pretty much the limit if you ask me. :)
P.S. There was a restock this week–I think the dragons were part of that!! They’re some of my favorites.
Anyone have any suggestions regarding Werkshop sizing if I typically wear lululemon bottoms size 4-6 and 26-27 in skinny jeans (such as Paige)? Thanks!
hey suebee, that is tough… i think a small would work if you like a lot of compression, but a medium would probably be fine too since werkshop IS so compressive. I’m a 6 (once in awhile a 4) and 27-28 in jeans and I like the M. my sister is a 4, 26 in jeans and the M was just a tad loose on her. sounds like you are right in between! maybe email werkshop. they are helpful!
Thank you very much, Carrie! That is exactly what I wanted to know more about, and what I was afraid of. Also, have you found the waistband to be particularly constrictive as well or more on the loose side (relative to the legs)? I’m built fairly straight, but often feel like I have fluffy tummy… Thanks again
it’s pretty constrictive in general, but not really more than the legs. it’s a relatively high rise, so it holds in some “fluff” and is not particularly prone to muffin top in my experience.
Yup, based on what I’ve heard, I agree with Carrie–either could work, depending on your preference. One thing to keep in mind is that they’ll probably be quite tight when you receive them, but once you get them on and wear them a couple times, they’ll mold to your body.
I love this post and agree 100%. My biggest lesson learned from the Lucky and Domino magazines was that your clothes and home shouldn’t be matchy-matchy and that your personal style should take center stage. I’ve gotten a bit boring over the years and have found myself veering toward matchy things because it’s easy. I need to step up my game on that front. But I’ve also found that I’m refining my style too, which is good.
Good point! Also something I should keep in mind as I pick out house things (mine is mostly empty). There’s a lot of overlap between the two, for sure.
I love spacey leggings.